Tag Archives: Shame

Chemotherapy Burned Away Self-Hatred

Eve Ensler

Eve Ensler was physically and sexually abused by her father while growing up. This drove her to become an activist and playwright. She gained a very controversial yet monumental role in women’s rights.

She has spent most of her life talking, listening, traveling the world, helping women. Ensler met women who were raped in Bosnia, cut in Kenya, destroyed in Afghanistan. She used the very thing that had broken her to encourage women. She urged them not to become bound by the awful things that happened.

While she is a controversial activist and playwright Ensler carries another title proudly: cancer survivor. Eve was diagnosed with uterine cancer. Three days later she had a nine-hour operation. She lost many organs and nodes. It was a life changing event.

It was through her illness that she began to experience true healing. According to an interview she had on the Today Show, “For years I carried around such darkness, such sorrow, such self-hatred. When I would sit with the port and five hours of chemotherapy juice would go into my body I would visualize it burning away.”

Ensler challenged women to respect their bodies no matter what society says. She struggled with the same insecurities as the women she encountered all over the world. She disassociated herself from her violated body. She felt ashamed of what had happened to her.

She also believed the lies of western society that define beauty and determines what a woman is expected to look like. Who would have thought that her diagnosis of cancer would become the wake up she needed all along?

Armed with this new self-awareness and love for her life she has been able to more effectively communicate with women. Eve has been able to help women overcome obstacles.

These women learn how to begin rebuilding their life. This is a broken world filled with broken people who hope for wholeness.

There is hope. Jesus Christ, God’s Son, came to give each of us the opportunity to begin again. He took the pain of our failures on His shoulders. He bore the pain of our brokenness on His back. He is willing to give you new life and new hope.

It begins with a simple prayer: “Dear Jesus, I am sorry for the wrong things I have done. I am broken and need healing. I am tired of the pain life dealt me. Please give me new life as I declare You to be Lord and Savior of my life. In Jesus’ name, amen!”

If you prayed that prayer, click the button below and someone will contact you to help you take the next step toward wholeness.

-Kateyn Flowers

 

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Posted in: Brokenness, Conditional Love, Falsehood, Featured, Illness, Insignificance, Shame / Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Olympics Shame and Restoration

With the London Olympics right around the corner, talk surrounding the games is just beginning to ramp up. That generally means people talk about past Olympic greats like Jesse Owens, Aleksandr Karelin or Mark Spitz.  But there is another list of athletes whose names appear time after time in Olympic discussions, they are the disgraced athletes who ended their careers not on the winners’ platform, but in shame.

Everyone experiences shame at one time or another. Sometimes it is merited. Sometimes, it is not. Jim Thorpe was stripped of his 1912 Olympic medals only to have the International Olympic Committee restore them 30 years after his death. His story paints a graphic picture of the loss of shame and the joy of restoration even if it comes late.

Shame is a ruthless predator that stalks us without mercy. It hurts most when we feel shamed by those we love.  Sometimes shame comes from a spouse. Sometimes it comes from a family member. It may come from the work place or even society as in the case of disgraced athletes losing an Olympic medal.

One thing is certain, if you are experiencing shame in your life, you long for a way out. You probably hope for someone to come along and love you again as though the problem that caused your shame never happened. 

There is real a solution to shame. Jesus Christ offers anyone who comes to Him and asks the opportunity to find forgiveness and overcome shame.  He took your shame on His shoulders when men nailed Him to the Cross. He offers you a new beginning and the promise of new life.  

Shame destroys.  It destroys our hope. It destroys our futures.  It destroys our trust.

Jesus can restore each of these things when we ask Him for His forgiveness and a new beginning. If you need a way past shame, if you need a new beginning, you can ask Jesus to forgive you for the wrong things you have done and start fresh. Sound good? Simply click the button below that says “Yes, I prayed the Prayer” and someone will contact you soon.

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Conrad Murray Found Guilty!

Dr. Conrad Murray was convicted last week of involuntary manslaughter in the death of singer Michael Jackson. Even though he pled innocent, a jury of his peers found him guilty of not correctly carrying out his duties as a doctor as society requires. Now, he must live with the guilt and shame arising from his professional and personal failures.

Guilt and shame often go together.  When guilt remains unresolved, shame follows.  Feeling guilty just isn’t enough.  Overcoming guilt requires a person to for something that went wrong. Many people never learn how to let go of their guilt because they have never been forced to see themselves honestly.

That might be true for someone like Conrad Murray.  Instead of learning to let go by resolving his guilt, he may be allowed to carry on his life without many consequences.  Even Murray’s conviction might not mean that he will serve much jail time. California authorities released Lindsay Lohan after just 4 ½ hours for her parole violation recently because of jail overcrowding.) 

Ironically, Murray might even be allowed to resume his medical practice one day. That doesn’t mean he will necessarily enjoy his freedom. (Like all of us, Murray must be freed from guilt, not by the courts, but from within. 

Unfortunately, many people never seek forgiveness. Like so many others before him, Conrad Murray will not likely be able to move on with his life until he finds forgiveness. Often, people fail to overcome personal failure because they never learn to say, “I am sorry.”

Perhaps you have battled guilt.  You can find freedom again and know the joy of restored relationships. Real forgiveness begins by telling God: “I am sorry. I was wrong. Forgive me, God.”  When He answers, He will give you the tools you need to resolve guilt.  He will change your life and help you find freedom from Guilt. So, instead of living with guilt, you can move forward and overcome shame that once bound you.

You can begin with a simple prayer: 

“Dear Jesus, I am guilty today. I need Your forgiveness today for the things I have done wrong. Please help me to find peace. Help me to be restored and live for You. I declare You to be the Lord of my Life, in Jesus’ name, amen!”

If you prayed that prayer, please click the button below and someone will help you take the next steps toward living a guilt-free life!

- Bill Hennessy

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Joe Paterno and the Price of Shame

Sometimes, people are remembered more for their failures, than their victories. Joe Paterno, Penn State’s former Football coach won on the field (409 times) but failed where it mattered most. He lost his job this week after it became apparent he did little to stop another coach (Jerry Sandusky) from repeatedly molesting boys.   Until this week, the man known as “JoePa” had a storied career that spanned decades.

Now, Paterno must endure the disgrace that comes from “things done in secret” being brought to light. He failed a test of character. He had the opportunity to do right but failed to act.

Who could have imagined the fall of such legendary leader resulting not from things he did, but things he didn’t do? Today, JoePa must learn to overcome the shame and guilt people are throwing his way.

Shame is very difficult to overcome. That’s because it is not an attack based on a person’s actions, but on his/her worth as a person. Like so many others before him, Joe Paterno must find peace with himself before he can hope to find peace with others.

The key to overcoming shame is finding forgiveness. That means accepting responsibility not only for our actions, but for the pain our actions caused others. If you have acted in shameful ways, you can find peace again.  Jesus Christ offers that peace when we come to Him for forgiveness.

It begins with a simple prayer like this:  “Dear Jesus. I am ashamed of myself. I have done wrong. My actions have hurt my relationship with you and others.  I am sorry for the things I have done. Please forgive me and give me a new start. Please be the Lord of my life and help me to find peace again. In Jesus’ name. Amen!”

There is no need to feel shame if you have found forgiveness. You can start by following Jesus today. If you have prayed the prayer, please click the “yes” button below and someone will help you take the next step forward.

- Bill Hennessy

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Shame Destroys – God Restores

Everyone feels shame from time to time. Unfortunately, shame isn’t just a judgment of your actions; it is a judgment of your worth. “You should be ashamed of yourself!” is a common statement that causes uncommon harm.

If you feel shame today, you know that people judge both our actions and our value.  Making mistakes is a common thing, but sometimes the wrongs we do carry an extra price tag.  If you have been shamed, you know that shame brings an ally to every battle: guilt. If you feel both Shame and guilt, they can convince you that you have no value, no worth and no hope.

You can overcome shame.  It requires you to be honest with yourself. If you have done wrong things, you need forgiveness and a new start.

Overcoming shame starts when you pray because God specializes in new beginnings.  He knows that we all make mistakes. He takes your need so seriously that He sent His own Son, Jesus, into our world to take our sins on His shoulders. God knows you feel ashamed.  He understands that you have done wrong and that you feel badly about it.    

Your shameful actions do not need to shape your future. Instead, you can confess your wrongs to God and receive forgiveness. When you confess your actions to God, He offers you the opportunity to start again. God knows you feel ashamed, so He makes a way for you to live in grace. It starts with a prayer that you can pray today.

- Bill Hennessy

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Overcoming Shame With Forgiveness

 

If you have made serious life mistakes (and who hasn’t?) it is likely that you have experienced the pain of shame and guilt.  Feeling shame hurts at such a deep level that it seems difficult to even take your next breath. It can seem like being you are being stoned with accusing words

Those who use shame as a weapon attack more than your mistakes. They attack your value as a person, stepping past your error and attacking your character, value and worth.  It’s a horribly wounding moment that leaves you hurt and shamed.

If you feel ashamed today, you probably long for a way to heal.  Can you overcome shame? Yes!  But you will need help.  Since your accusers attack not only your mistakes, but your worth as a person, you need someone to assure you that you still have value.

If you feel shame, there is hope.  Jesus Christ offers you forgiveness for any shameful actions you may have committed and real healing from the wounds you experienced at the hands of your accusers. He knows you need help overcoming shame. He can give it to you as your surrender your life to Him.  Jesus paid the price for your sin and desires to bring you freedom and a new start.

When you experience His forgiveness, you won’t need to feel ashamed any longer. When you experience His new life, you will know you are accepted by your creator. There is no greater joy than friendship with Jesus.  Everyone feels shame at some point in life.  It’s great to know that forgiveness and healing is just a prayer away.

- Bill Hennessy
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Living With Guilt

Are you living with guilt?  If so, you probably battle with how to let go of your past failings. Feeling guilty is a common human emotion.  Unfortunately, it is not easy to overcome guilt.  That’s because guilt and shame often go together, and together they make a powerful enemy.

To truly be freed from guilt, you must first overcome shame.  Guilt is based on the understanding that you did something bad.  Shame declares that you yourself are “bad.”  As long as you believe that you, (more than your actions) are bad, you cannot resolve guilt.

Guilt makes you deserving of appropriate punishment. Shame makes punishment the best you can hope for in this life.   In order to find forgiveness for the wrong things you have done, you must also find freedom from shame.

Real forgiveness is a gift from God. It comes when you declare to God, “I was wrong. I am sorry.”  God’s forgiveness is essential to overcoming guilt.  Saying, “forgive me God” gives you access to God’s limitless grace.  Grace not only forgives us for the wrongs we’ve done, it offers a solution for our shame.

Learning to let go of shame is key to overcoming guilt.  Asking for forgiveness from Jesus is as simple as praying an honest prayer.  You can begin by saying: “Dear Jesus, I am sorry for the wrong things I have done.  I was wrong, please forgive me. I choose to follow you now as my Lord and Savior. Please heal me from the pain of my guilt and shame. Please give me a new start. In Jesus’ name.  Amen!”

-Bill Hennessy

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Free Yourself From Shame

 

There is a phrase used in some parts of the world that defines shame so well.  It is called: “Losing face.”  When you are shamed by others, it seems like you lose your identity.  Our faces distinguish us from those around us. Our faces make us unique.  Imagine if you actually lost your face what an obstacle it would be to finding acceptance.  

Overcoming shame is a big problem for many people. Perhaps it is because we cannot live up to expectations. Perhaps it is because we cannot please everyone. 

Shame and guilt are very common problems no matter where you live.  Most people feel shame from time to time. For some people, it isn’t just a problem it is a life-stopping battle.

Someone has said that there is a big difference between doing something bad and “being bad.”  Shame doesn’t know the difference. It is a value statement that lowers our value to ourselves and everyone around us.  So can you overcome shame? Can you learn to see yourself without the criticism of others? Yes! If you are ashamed of yourself, there is hope.

If you feel ashamed of yourself today, there is a way to find freedom from the condemnation others have loaded onto your shoulders.  Go to Jesus!  He is the one who lifts our burdens. We can find our value in Him and overcome the pain of shame and guilt.

Jesus came to earth because God knew that our sins shamed each of us to the point of destruction. Jesus never sinned, yet He took on the shame of the cross so that you can be free from everything that devalues you and causes you pain. 

When you come to Jesus and confess to Him that you have made mistakes He offers you a forgiveness that changes you from the inside. You can learn to feel good about yourself again and overcome the shame and guilt that rules your life.

Begin with a simple prayer: “Dear Jesus. I am sorry for the things that I have done that have brought shame and guilt into my life and hurt those around me. Please forgive me and give me a new beginning. Please become the savior of my life, in Jesus’ name. Amen.” When you do, you will begin a journey from shame to joy!

- Bill Hennessy

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How to Overcome Shame

All of us have experienced shame at one time or another.  It might have been a missed goal in soccer, forgetting your lines in a play or falling down in front of a crowd when you were a child.  Your shame might be rooted in much deeper failings as an adult like going through a bankruptcy, losing a job or getting caught in a lie.  Regardless of the incident, making a mistake in the presence of others can leave us feeling shame and guilt.

If you struggle to overcome shame, you know how easy it is to turn a simple mistake into a statement of fact about yourself. Instead of saying “That was clumsy,” you begin to say “I am clumsy.”  That subtle difference can cause you to feel shame that words cannot express.

Overcoming shame may seem impossible to you, but God offers a way to put shame behind you once and for all. The Bible declares that "Everyone who believes in him will not be put to shame." (Romans 10:11) Putting trust in Jesus Christ changes our reality. God knows that we may doubt this, so he repeats it in I Peter 2:6: “whoever believes in him will not be put to shame."

 

Jesus Christ came to take away our shame and guilt. He knows that we are human and prone to making mistakes. He offers us forgiveness and peace.  Our shameful actions can be forgiven and we can learn to live in grace. By asking Jesus to forgive the wrongs you’ve done, you can learn to see yourself as God sees you, someone with great worth. Although you feel ashamed of your failings, God values you as a son or daughter. He will take away your shame and give you the strength to change and grow.

-Bill Hennessy

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Turning Shame to Your Advantage

Newspaper publisher Rupert Murdoch is a successful businessman by anyone’s reckoning.  Yet, he is as human as any other person.  Can you imagine the shame he felt recently as he walked into the British Parliament to answer questions about the illegal actions of his “News of the World” publication?  He described it as the most humbling moment of his life.

Shame and guilt are like that.  Those feelings can knock the wind right out of even the strongest person. Overcoming shame can be quite difficult to overcome.  People tend to remember our failings long after they’ve forgotten our successes. As a result, many people are desperate to start over…. without shame!

If you have felt the shame and guilt of wrongs you have committed, you probably want a new start too. There is hope!  Regardless of your shameful behavior, Jesus Christ offers you real forgiveness and a new beginning. If you are ashamed of your actions, God can use that powerful emotion to get your attention and tell you that it is time for a change.

If you feel shame today for something you have done, you can find forgiveness. Real forgiveness when comes when we openly admit that we made a mistake. Ask God for a new beginning and allow him to take away the wrongs you have done.   When you do, you will find that God is faithful to remove your guilt and shame and to offer you a new relationship with Him.
 

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