Category Archives: Shame

One Heart, Second Chance

BlogAn inspirational story from Texas has recently made its way to the public eye. In 2008, a high school football game was played in Grapevine, Texas. This was no ordinary game.

The Gainesville State Tornadoes reached the Grapevine Faith field on a Friday night.

They were met by an unusual scene. Some of the Grapevine fans were cheering for the rival team! They even formed a spirit line for the Tornadoes to run through when they came onto the field. Half of the Grapevine cheerleading squad was also rooting for the opposing team.

Gainesville’s quarterback and middle linebacker, Isaiah told ESPN, “I never thought I’d hear people cheering for us to hit their kids. I wouldn’t expect another parent to tell somebody to hit their kids. But they wanted us to!” That night, the Tornadoes lost the game, 33-14. But they were encouraged!

The question arises: why would Grapevine Faith do all this for a rival team? Gainesville State School is a maximum-security correctional facility. Every game they play is on the road.

Players are escorted to and from the field by 12 uniformed guards with handcuffs in their back pockets. They are serving time for drugs, assault and robbery. It is a hard road they are traveling and few people really believe they can change.

Kris Hogan, Faith’s head coach, said “Here’s the message I want to say, ‘You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth.’” It was almost more than the Tornado quarterback could take in.

“Lord, I don’t know how this happened, so I don’t know how to thank you, but I never would have known there was so many people in the world that would care about us.” said Isaiah.

As Tornadoes walked back to their bus, they were handed a bag for the ride home. Inside was food, a bible and an encouraging letter from one of the Grapevine Faith players. That night started something significant to all involved.

The annual game between the two teams is now known as the “One Heart Bowl.” Every year the Grapevine fans are split. As part of their admission to the game, fans are encouraged to bring ankle socks and gloves for Gainesville students to wear during the game.

You may struggle with self-worth like many of the players from Gainesville State School. But you have tremendous worth in the eyes of God. So much so that He sent His one and only Son into our world to provide a way for you to have relationship with Him.

Your life has value. You may struggle with how you feel about yourself, but make no mistake, God values you. He gave His most precious gift to you when He offered you salvation through Jesus Christ. Now the decision is yours. Will you choose Jesus?

If you are ready to find your worth in God’s love for you, pray this prayer: “Dear Jesus, I am sorry for the wrong things I have done. Please forgive me for all those things. I ask You to become Lord and Savior of my life. Help me to find my worth in You. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

If you prayed that prayer today, please click the “yes” button below and someone will contact you soon.

-Catherine Anderson

 

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Olympics Shame and Restoration

Jim ThorpeWith the London Olympics right around the corner, talk surrounding the games is just beginning to ramp up. That generally means people talk about past Olympic greats like Jesse Owens, Aleksandr Karelin or Mark Spitz. But there is another list of athletes whose names appear time after time in Olympic discussions, they are the disgraced athletes who ended their careers not on the winners’ platform, but in shame.

Everyone experiences shame at one time or another. Sometimes it is merited. Sometimes, it is not. Jim Thorpe was stripped of his 1912 Olympic medals only to have the International Olympic Committee restore them 30 years after his death. His story paints a graphic picture of the loss of shame and the joy of restoration even if it comes late.

Shame is a ruthless predator that stalks us without mercy. It hurts most when we feel shamed by those we love. Sometimes shame comes from a spouse. Sometimes it comes from a family member. It may come from the work place or even society as in the case of disgraced athletes losing an Olympic medal.

One thing is certain, if you are experiencing shame in your life, you long for a way out. You probably hope for someone to come along and love you again as though the problem that caused your shame never happened.

There is real a solution to shame. Jesus Christ offers anyone who comes to Him and asks the opportunity to find forgiveness and overcome shame. He took your shame on His shoulders when men nailed Him to the Cross. He offers you a new beginning and the promise of new life.

Shame destroys. It destroys our hope. It destroys our futures. It destroys our trust.

Jesus can restore each of these things when we ask Him for His forgiveness and a new beginning. If you need a way past shame, if you need a new beginning, you can ask Jesus to forgive you for the wrong things you have done and start fresh. Sound good? Simply click the button below that says “Yes, I prayed the Prayer” and someone will contact you soon.

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Joe Paterno and the Price of Shame

Sometimes, people are remembered more for their failures, than their victories. Joe Paterno, Penn State’s former Football coach won on the field (409 times) but failed where it mattered most. He lost his job this week after it became apparent he did little to stop another coach (Jerry Sandusky) from repeatedly molesting boys.   Until this week, the man known as “JoePa” had a storied career that spanned decades.

Now, Paterno must endure the disgrace that comes from “things done in secret” being brought to light. He failed a test of character. He had the opportunity to do right but failed to act.

Who could have imagined the fall of such legendary leader resulting not from things he did, but things he didn’t do? Today, JoePa must learn to overcome the shame and guilt people are throwing his way.

Shame is very difficult to overcome. That’s because it is not an attack based on a person’s actions, but on his/her worth as a person. Like so many others before him, Joe Paterno must find peace with himself before he can hope to find peace with others.

The key to overcoming shame is finding forgiveness. That means accepting responsibility not only for our actions, but for the pain our actions caused others. If you have acted in shameful ways, you can find peace again.  Jesus Christ offers that peace when we come to Him for forgiveness.

It begins with a simple prayer like this:  “Dear Jesus. I am ashamed of myself. I have done wrong. My actions have hurt my relationship with you and others.  I am sorry for the things I have done. Please forgive me and give me a new start. Please be the Lord of my life and help me to find peace again. In Jesus’ name. Amen!”

There is no need to feel shame if you have found forgiveness. You can start by following Jesus today. If you have prayed the prayer, please click the “yes” button below and someone will help you take the next step forward.

- Bill Hennessy

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Shame Destroys – God Restores

Everyone feels shame from time to time. Unfortunately, shame isn’t just a judgment of your actions; it is a judgment of your worth. “You should be ashamed of yourself!” is a common statement that causes uncommon harm.

If you feel shame today, you know that people judge both our actions and our value.  Making mistakes is a common thing, but sometimes the wrongs we do carry an extra price tag.  If you have been shamed, you know that shame brings an ally to every battle: guilt. If you feel both Shame and guilt, they can convince you that you have no value, no worth and no hope.

You can overcome shame.  It requires you to be honest with yourself. If you have done wrong things, you need forgiveness and a new start.

Overcoming shame starts when you pray because God specializes in new beginnings.  He knows that we all make mistakes. He takes your need so seriously that He sent His own Son, Jesus, into our world to take our sins on His shoulders. God knows you feel ashamed.  He understands that you have done wrong and that you feel badly about it.    

Your shameful actions do not need to shape your future. Instead, you can confess your wrongs to God and receive forgiveness. When you confess your actions to God, He offers you the opportunity to start again. God knows you feel ashamed, so He makes a way for you to live in grace. It starts with a prayer that you can pray today.

- Bill Hennessy

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Overcoming Shame With Forgiveness

 

If you have made serious life mistakes (and who hasn’t?) it is likely that you have experienced the pain of shame and guilt.  Feeling shame hurts at such a deep level that it seems difficult to even take your next breath. It can seem like being you are being stoned with accusing words

Those who use shame as a weapon attack more than your mistakes. They attack your value as a person, stepping past your error and attacking your character, value and worth.  It’s a horribly wounding moment that leaves you hurt and shamed.

If you feel ashamed today, you probably long for a way to heal.  Can you overcome shame? Yes!  But you will need help.  Since your accusers attack not only your mistakes, but your worth as a person, you need someone to assure you that you still have value.

If you feel shame, there is hope.  Jesus Christ offers you forgiveness for any shameful actions you may have committed and real healing from the wounds you experienced at the hands of your accusers. He knows you need help overcoming shame. He can give it to you as your surrender your life to Him.  Jesus paid the price for your sin and desires to bring you freedom and a new start.

When you experience His forgiveness, you won’t need to feel ashamed any longer. When you experience His new life, you will know you are accepted by your creator. There is no greater joy than friendship with Jesus.  Everyone feels shame at some point in life.  It’s great to know that forgiveness and healing is just a prayer away.

- Bill Hennessy
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Free Yourself From Shame

 

There is a phrase used in some parts of the world that defines shame so well.  It is called: “Losing face.”  When you are shamed by others, it seems like you lose your identity.  Our faces distinguish us from those around us. Our faces make us unique.  Imagine if you actually lost your face what an obstacle it would be to finding acceptance.  

Overcoming shame is a big problem for many people. Perhaps it is because we cannot live up to expectations. Perhaps it is because we cannot please everyone. 

Shame and guilt are very common problems no matter where you live.  Most people feel shame from time to time. For some people, it isn’t just a problem it is a life-stopping battle.

Someone has said that there is a big difference between doing something bad and “being bad.”  Shame doesn’t know the difference. It is a value statement that lowers our value to ourselves and everyone around us.  So can you overcome shame? Can you learn to see yourself without the criticism of others? Yes! If you are ashamed of yourself, there is hope.

If you feel ashamed of yourself today, there is a way to find freedom from the condemnation others have loaded onto your shoulders.  Go to Jesus!  He is the one who lifts our burdens. We can find our value in Him and overcome the pain of shame and guilt.

Jesus came to earth because God knew that our sins shamed each of us to the point of destruction. Jesus never sinned, yet He took on the shame of the cross so that you can be free from everything that devalues you and causes you pain. 

When you come to Jesus and confess to Him that you have made mistakes He offers you a forgiveness that changes you from the inside. You can learn to feel good about yourself again and overcome the shame and guilt that rules your life.

Begin with a simple prayer: “Dear Jesus. I am sorry for the things that I have done that have brought shame and guilt into my life and hurt those around me. Please forgive me and give me a new beginning. Please become the savior of my life, in Jesus’ name. Amen.” When you do, you will begin a journey from shame to joy!

- Bill Hennessy

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How to Overcome Shame

All of us have experienced shame at one time or another.  It might have been a missed goal in soccer, forgetting your lines in a play or falling down in front of a crowd when you were a child.  Your shame might be rooted in much deeper failings as an adult like going through a bankruptcy, losing a job or getting caught in a lie.  Regardless of the incident, making a mistake in the presence of others can leave us feeling shame and guilt.

If you struggle to overcome shame, you know how easy it is to turn a simple mistake into a statement of fact about yourself. Instead of saying “That was clumsy,” you begin to say “I am clumsy.”  That subtle difference can cause you to feel shame that words cannot express.

Overcoming shame may seem impossible to you, but God offers a way to put shame behind you once and for all. The Bible declares that "Everyone who believes in him will not be put to shame." (Romans 10:11) Putting trust in Jesus Christ changes our reality. God knows that we may doubt this, so he repeats it in I Peter 2:6: “whoever believes in him will not be put to shame."

 

Jesus Christ came to take away our shame and guilt. He knows that we are human and prone to making mistakes. He offers us forgiveness and peace.  Our shameful actions can be forgiven and we can learn to live in grace. By asking Jesus to forgive the wrongs you’ve done, you can learn to see yourself as God sees you, someone with great worth. Although you feel ashamed of your failings, God values you as a son or daughter. He will take away your shame and give you the strength to change and grow.

-Bill Hennessy

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Turning Shame to Your Advantage

Newspaper publisher Rupert Murdoch is a successful businessman by anyone’s reckoning.  Yet, he is as human as any other person.  Can you imagine the shame he felt recently as he walked into the British Parliament to answer questions about the illegal actions of his “News of the World” publication?  He described it as the most humbling moment of his life.

Shame and guilt are like that.  Those feelings can knock the wind right out of even the strongest person. Overcoming shame can be quite difficult to overcome.  People tend to remember our failings long after they’ve forgotten our successes. As a result, many people are desperate to start over…. without shame!

If you have felt the shame and guilt of wrongs you have committed, you probably want a new start too. There is hope!  Regardless of your shameful behavior, Jesus Christ offers you real forgiveness and a new beginning. If you are ashamed of your actions, God can use that powerful emotion to get your attention and tell you that it is time for a change.

If you feel shame today for something you have done, you can find forgiveness. Real forgiveness when comes when we openly admit that we made a mistake. Ask God for a new beginning and allow him to take away the wrongs you have done.   When you do, you will find that God is faithful to remove your guilt and shame and to offer you a new relationship with Him.
 

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Overcoming Shame

 

“You should be ashamed of yourself!”  These words bring a flood of emotions to anyone who has been caught doing wrong.  While it is true that we do wrong things, this phrase attacks us well beyond our actions. It attacks our value as human beings.  

Shameful acts are often carried out by damaged people who need restoration just as much as they need correction. If you feel shame today, it is likely that you were caught in some wrong action.  Or, it might be that you were accused, but never really did what others believed you to do. Either way, you probably feel shame and guilt.

What is the secret of overcoming shame?  We must admit that our actions reflect what is in our hearts. If you’ve done something shameful perhaps it is because you do not know your worth to God and to those around you.  

Shame robs us of our identity in Christ.  Yes, I do wrong, but I am not worthless to God. Yes, I make mistakes and sometimes even hurt other people, but God still sees my value. Shame robs us of that value and makes us feel worthless and useless.  This is not true!

The Bible tells us that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us!  If I ask Him to be my Lord and Savior, He forgives my failings and offers me His worth.  Jesus took my shame on His shoulders when He was crucified. You can find the same relief from shame I found by making Him your Lord and Savior too!

- Bill Hennessy
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Freedom From Shame

 

Shame – Thoughts on its real effect on us and how we can deal with it.

As psychologist Norman Wright puts it, "Guilt says `I have made a mistake; "Shame says" I am a mistake.'"

Making a mistake is an action we can mostly deal with, even if it only to say, 'Sorry'. There is usually a feeling of guilt here that can be dealt with, whether to another person or to the Lord God.

Shame is much harder to define, because the emotions are deeply involved, as we begin to think with a victim mentality. Shame is by and large caused by an inner emotional conflict between what you feel you ought to be, and a shameful life style you are living; that has either, your own disapproval or that of your community.  This is a conflict that attacks your sense of self-worth. If you accept less than you know to be the best in yourself, you will be plagued with a sense of shame and guilt.  

Overcoming shame is possible when you first identify what the emotional conflict really is, and then find someone trustworthy you can confide in. We tend to shy away from such an idea, because we are first of all opening ourselves to exposure. There is really only one person we can turn to with confidence and bare our soul about our innermost self and that is the person who loves you unconditionally, who accepts you just as you are and is ready to heal and comfort you. His name is Jesus, the Son of God, who took your shame with Him and nailed it to his cross.

Mike Bellah mentioned a valuable truth when he wrote, "For it is the labels we place on ourselves that become self-fulfilling prophecies, resulting in either shame or success."

My good friend Dr. Jim Roane wrote: Believe me, the shame will come back at you but you can say no to those old feelings. Once you are forgiven, that grief over bad behavior becomes false grief because God no longer holds you accountable. When you allow Jesus into your heart and to take control of your life, you can become a new person. 

You can feel good about yourself again! You can feel pure on the inside. Remember when you feel shame, you are able walk with self-belief that you are forgiven. When we believe in Jesus, we become good in Him. The good behavior of Christ is God's great gift to us to make us good, also. Don’t be ashamed! This is the best time to ask Jesus to take control of your life. Do it right now and find deliverance from shame.

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